2013: the year the gin and tonic got out of hand
This 2013 has given much, good and varied: for twerking, for a Pope from San Lorenzo, for memes, for Lou Reed, for Walter White ("Say my name") and for hundreds of thousands of cats in every corner of the Internet; but let's go to the gastronomic, that we lose. 2013 will be remembered as the year in which a crested pimp planted the iron throne of haute cuisine in Madrid -twenty years later, the year in which the kitchen stepped on the silly box (we will regret this), **the year of quinoa, gastro-makers and vermouth **. But above all things, 2013 was the year that the gin and tonic got out of hand.
And it is that at Mantel & Cuchillo we are, despite everything, staunch defenders (let me go I tell you!) of the classic combination of Johann Jacob Schweppe. The main drink of the Queen Mother, Pitita Ridruejo and Winston Churchill . The gin and tonic (here my recipe: gin, tonic, ice, lemon peel) as an aperitif, like that short drink that prepares the crop and the spirit for whatever comes. The "before"; a bitter drink, zasca, and we go to the dance floor to see what the hell is going on with that blonde, compadre. And God save the Queen.
So we can only be very offended by the fool with the gin and tonic and the vegetable stews in a balloon glass. To the point: these are the 19 most absurd gin and tonics of the year.
1) The non-alcoholic gin and tonic with gold dust. Without alcohol -aha- and with gold dust. Brilli brilli for Paulina Rubio's definitive cup.
2)Gin jam - Tonic. Or Gelée de Gin-Tonic, which is more like this. "Ideal to accompany cold seafood appetizers" they say on the label. Or on toast with coffee, what the heck.
3)Gin - tonic with violets, jasmine, hibiscus, orchids, daffodils and rose petals. Or Oscar Wilde's ultimate boner.
4) Gin - tonic with cinnamon, juniper, cloves, cardamom, pepper, saffron, thyme and rosemary. Or Jiro Ono's nightmare.
5) Gin - tonic with asparagus, peas, leek and beetroot. Rodrigo, mischievous, we know you like it.
6)Tea Tonic. “Halfway between infusion and gin and tonic” . Halfway between laughter and train tracks, I add.
7) Gin Afternoon Tea. “The gin and tonic that is served in a cup of tea”. And when it seemed we couldn't sink any lower... a kettle, folks.
8)Gin nougat - Tonic. I swear it exists. It is no longer enough with the eternal -very difficult- doubt between hard or soft nougat. Now it's hard, soft or gin and tonic.
9) Gin - tonic with caviar, essence of aroma of grilled Kobe and encrusted glass of Harry Winston. You, young and perky reader who is a fan of Ryan Gosling and Beyoncé, think that you would never-ever-in-any-case fall prey to a guy like Flavio Briatore. "You're not one of those" and such. Well, wait until he plants you a caviar gin and tonic at the bar of his Sardinia Billonaire Club. Wait wait.
10) Milk chocolate and gin bar - Tonic. Chocolate, milk, gin and tonic. On a tablet. A chocholate bar. Imagine the brainstorming of that creation. Seriously, think about it.
11)The gin - molecular tonic. Spherifications hit our old and tired combined with this gin jelly and tonic spherification. A gin and tonic in one bite. Goodbye, croquette. Hello, gin and tonic.
12) Scallops on spicy GinTonic. My head explodes. I have found this combination in a restaurant in Puerto de Sagunto. Rafa Mora and Labrador are from Puerto de Sagunto.
13) Gin-tonic with olive oil. What does the barman on duty say that “olive oil would add texture as well as giving the combination extra nutritional properties”. But everything has a limit, trendsetters friends. Olive oil or touch it!
14) Gin Macaron - Tonic. The cuqui gin and tonic, the gin and tonic that Amélie would drink if Amélie drank gin and tonics (what will Amelie drink? Clouds?). A “macaron filled with gin ganache and cucumber jam”, so pretty…
15)Gin and tonic cupcake. The hipster gin and tonic. Or what happens, that the Malenis do not have the right to crack a gin and tonic while darning colored socks and drawing inspirational phrases with chalk? "Life is wonderful and everything will be fine and I love you forever" and this bearded rock knows it.
16) Gin flavored condoms - Tonic . Ok, they don't exist. Yes, there are condoms with a cuba libre flavor from an Italian fashion firm (hello, Oliviero Toscani) and I wonder… what are you waiting for, Durex?
17) The gin - tonic of the Congress of Deputies. To 3 turkeys that the cubata de Larios comes out to their lordships. Now we understand many things.
18) Gin - tonic on the plate . Which is a great dish from Pedro Subijana in Akelarre (gin jelly with juniper berry sauce and lemon ice cream quenelle) and it was probably Pedro who opened the dessert season with our beloved cocktail, but…
19) Gin fritter - Tonic. Fritter. From. Gin. Tonic.
Keep calm and...