Beware of those aberrations that you call 'paella'
1. Of course Valencia has a river. And with a channel that not even the Danube . Another thing is that it does not have water.
two. If the River is the lung of Valencia, the neighborhood of Ruzafa is his liver .
3. Of the 375 days of the year, no there is reason for 278 not to have falleras celebrations.
Four. Whoever has not sung the blanket to the coll cannot say that he has lived.
5. Your youth club has changed its name 18 times , four times a year.
Ruzafa in Valencia: oh yes
6. At weddings, baptisms and communions they sound firecrackers . There are cases of divorce.
7. Any pyrotechnic display that happens outside your city sounds weak, deflated, and accompanied by a gesture of bah!
8. Yes to NATO if he decided to bomb Valencia, it is likely that no one would flinch . At most, someone would say that "failures start before each time...".
9. You love the smell of gunpowder in the morning.
10. A Batman has plagiarized the shield of Valencia.
Will it be Batman from Valencia?
eleven. In summer the beach Hollyhock It looks like the Tokyo subway, but with beer cans.
12. There is consensus that Santiago Calatrava is a fantastic urban surveyor , capable of making all buildings match each other, provided they are all his.
13. Review of point 12. Perhaps there is not so much consensus.
14. To you, who haven't touched a bike since your first communion, there is no one who can get you off Valenbisi. Although if it's early in the morning, you still fall alone.
The Hollyhock
fifteen. Vital maxim: It's not noise, it's art.
16. But if you go on a motorcycle putting gas and doing wheelies, it's not art. You are a pimp.
17. The thing about the tete y teta has some truth.
18. There are tics that still betray those who lived the Bakalao route. oh oh!
19. Not Leonidas. Ximo Bayo will never go out of style . And there is something epic about it.
twenty. There will always be something to celebrate at La Pepica.
twenty-one. You know what a farton is without resorting to Google.
22. Information for the rest of the planet: the paellas with peas was already painful , but finding groves of broccoli and taquitos of ham borders on the aberration. It is not enough that the rice is yellow to be considered paella . Thanks.
23. A Valencian knows that the ingredient that distinguishes an authentic paella is the garrofo .
24. You know at least seven Vicentes. one is your father.
25. You only go to the City of Arts and Sciences when you have visitors . Except for the Umbracle, where they serve drinks.
The City of Arts and Sciences, a classic for visitors
26. Sudden anthropological perplexity on June 17: But how? How could they survive decades ago without AIR CONDITIONING???
27. The water of Valencia is an obvious euphemism. But go up it's scary.
28. In general terms, an almax is never too much.
29. In Valencia you don't play mus, but trick . And if it's in college, you play more.
Views from the Miguelete
30. You climbed the Miguelete as a child and you will not do it again until they put an elevator.
31. Indiana Jones was a dork. There was no need to assemble such a chicken. We all know that the only recognized and approved grail _(official product of the Vatican State) _ is in the Valencia Cathedral.
32. El Corte Inglés will say what it wants, but March 19 is not Father's Day, but Mother's Day. Cream.
Night of the Cream
33. boldly, you know how to distinguish a fallera from a civilian . Bows are usually the clue.
3. 4. Chromatic evidence: there is nothing redder than a foreigner in the sun in the Plaza de la Virgen.
35. Any sea that does not have the water temperature of the Mediterranean it leads you to the immediate digestion cut (between 27 and 43 degrees Celsius*) .
36. Are dephysios . Sure.
37. You grew up with María Abradelo on Canal Nou . And that explains everything.
* Sources: State Meteorological Agency (AEMET) and your aunt Amparo, the one married to an Asturian, while she bathes on the Llanes beach between cramps and seas of deu.
good bun
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