You want to have a good time, the best formula!
DID YOU LIKED OR DID NOT LIKE?
- It's going to be hard to find out. To get started, breaking the ice with an Andalusian is the easiest thing in the world. It doesn't matter if you're in the subway queue, in the greengrocer or in a bar: any place is good to start a conversation (if he or she doesn't start it before with you...)
- Now that you have established contact, the problem may be different: they are so nice that you will never be very clear if they are really interested in you or if they are simply giving free rein to their proverbial good vibes. You will see them smile at you, but you will see them smile at everyone; You'll see them making you laugh, but they've already made half the bar laugh...
- Also, they are very affectionate and stumpy, so that he put his hand on your waist while you talk or gave you a hug five minutes after meeting you may not mean anything other than likes you.
- If you need something and they help you, it is not one hundred percent sure that they are in the boat. Andalusians are usually very generous , and it is not uncommon that, without even knowing you, they invite you to something... or, for example, They offer you their house until you find a flat.
- We already know that you are asking yourself, with one hand on your chest and the other pointing to the sky in a gesture of desperation: "What, sir, what do I do to find out if this salacious Andalusian wants something with me ? Well, be very careful! By now, you must be dizzy with the speed at which your object of desire speaks, you may don't understand half of what he says (if it's from Malaga, we'll give you some clues to translate it here) and, if you don't have your ears trained for the double meanings , chances are you're missing a lot of the real conversation. yes, maybe I'm letting you down that you might end up in the same bed tonight while he talks to you about how he likes to go play soccer with his friends or tells you which is his favorite beach...
- The fame of funny we have not earned for free: if your Andalusian is of the common type you are going to laugh, and a lot. It is not that they are going to start telling jokes (although do not rule it out), but, as you will see, they have a funny way out for everything ... Even to talk about you. You better have a sense of humor, 'cause you're going to be the butt of a lot of jokes.
The market, as good a place as any to find love
WINNING THE ANDALUSIAN
- Most likely, you don't take their jokes badly, because they will have laughed at themselves before they are confident enough to mess with you (it will take about ten minutes or so to reach this state). But if by any chance you don't feel comfortable with his kind of humor -and you still want to march- you better not be noticed: in Andalusia, the "siesos maníos" (that is, the "lacios", the picky eaters) are enemy number one.
- If they like you (we're not talking about liking you, although it's a first step) in half an hour or so they will have made plans with you so that see everything beautiful in your area, namely: the beaches, the mountains, the white streets, the wineries... Each one will offer you their own, but all will have a perfect plan so that you, a foreigner, you fall in love with their land as much as they do. Of course, don't say no: the Andalusian signs up for a bombardment and you know what he thinks of the straight...- Eat well and try everything . you can even play dumb or the silly one saying that you had never eaten baton or skewers: they will be proud to introduce you to such delicacies and their bilirubin will rise, for sure! - Prepare to spend all your time on the street. Here the good weather accompanies the whole year, and beer, terraces and cheap tapas make life al fresco even more appealing. If you are one of those with a blanket and a sofa, bad news (at least, while the courtship stage lasts). - All this, of course, unless it rains, which is the closest the Andalusian is to the universal catastrophe. In that case, all plans are canceled, and until he can put his paws on the ground again without getting wet, we doubt he will leave the house to see you. And you will say: Are four drops stronger than the prospect of possible love? Indeed, we will respond, proud.
The terrace, the natural habitat of the Andalusian
- Is there by any chance a fair, carnival or pilgrimage -even a procession!- in sight? Put on some comfortable shoes and prepare your throat , because you are going to be walking, dancing and drinking for hours, maybe DAYS. The Andalusian takes the holidays very seriously , and expects you to do the same. And with enthusiasm!
- did we say that they like to drink ? Have we warned you about cheap beer and drinks? do Del Cartojal, rebujito, sweet wine and other local spirits ? In this regard, I will tell you something that someone who knew a lot about this told me : "The Andalusian is conquered by the liver" . - If you meet an Andalusian at 12 in the morning to have an aperitif, it is most likely that you end up at eight in the morning the next day drinking churros. During that day you will have given time to take a vermouth with its olives , change bars about fourteen times, go for a walk, meet about seven different groups of friends , fill up on tapas and even dance. I say this because if you are not prepared for this type of adventure, you still have time to shoot, I don't know, a Navarrese.
- Regarding dancing (we don't say "dance" because not all Andalusians dance, but everyone dances ) : maybe your copy don't know how to deal with sevillanas, and the normal thing is that you do not even realize it, because -despite what it may seem- it is not the only thing that is heard in these parts. But, whether it's because he's closing the bar, because you're at a wedding or it's a birthday party, if a sevillana sounds and the occasion calls for it, the Andalusian will comply with a more or less convincing pantomime (the level of conviction will depend on the cogorza that takes) . One more time: Follow him, and even offer to learn if you don't already know!
Whether or not they dress for the occasion, most take the fair very seriously.
- The Andalusian lexicon is rich -and quite amusing-, so ask without fear for what you do not understand; We will be happy to explain it to you. Also, you can appropriate some easy tagline, like "illo" or "ohú" and drop it at the least expected moment: you will draw his attention and you will surely make him laugh.
- Do not be too modest, or at least, do not expect the Andalusian to be. Be prepared to hear plenty of swear words (not maliciously, brilliantly introduced into the speech), to speak in a fairly loud tone of voice, to accept compliments with a smile (they will do it to you with brutal frankness) and... to see a lot of meat. The more sun, the less clothes, and in Andalusia, we have a lot of sun.
- If you are a boy, it may happen that you see the lead to your possible conquest before taking her to bed. You... and all your friends, of course. It will happen if there is a beach in between, and even rivers!
- If you are the one who goes after the Andalusian, at this point, probably, you will have earned it. Ole! Now, if it is the Andalusian who is behind you, beware: just as we said before that they are very generous, now we say that they are very mischievous . They will use all possible tricks to conquer you (and sometimes that may include cajoling you with half-truths), they'll be persuasive to the point of exhaustion, and may even, after you've worked at it all night, end up leaving with your best friend . But think about it: you have had your opportunity and you have not taken advantage of it, and the Andalusian, who thinks and speaks at 200 kilometers per hour -and loves to joke around-, has no time to lose. Also, if they do it for the Community: We have a number one lover status to maintain!
It is not a trivial matter that the first toples were made in Andalusia