In time you might forget
In your own city. What you save in money you earn in disappointment. The teacher who said how rich you were and how talented you were, to whom you made such cute drawings of a river and a little house and a sun, she could lose her vocation when she sees what you have become. Because she is going to choose exactly that day for her only night out of the year. And the same can be said of your clients, your neighbors, your family, your sweetheart of fifteen years. They will all be taking a little walk precisely that night, count on it.
In the country house. The point of doing the farewell in a rural house is that you can fall unconscious in a controlled area and that no one but you is a witness to the barbaric rituals that are going to take place there. So the instruments that are handled that night are funnels, an older stripper, accessories that were hidden in a locked drawer in the back of the costume shop, a lot of ice, a lot of Ibuprofen.
In another city. In the neighboring cities live peaceful people who have not messed with anyone, like in yours, but they do not know you. This is your chance to widen the playing field and involve them in your descent into hell so you don't feel alone in this. The thing leads to a lot of **signs that prohibit entry to bachelor parties in bars like the ones on Laurel Street in Logroño **. The logical evolution of all this could well be a rebirth of the decorations of the Tabernas desert as the only place where these parties are allowed in the entire Peninsula.
In other country. You have the advantage of the element of surprise. In China, for example, they will not understand anything. Before making an impulsive reservation, remember that in places like Marrakech they do not sell alcohol almost anywhere and without that you will feel strange, you will not know where to put your hands and the screams of the extra-motivated brother-in-law are going to be more alarming than manly . Try somewhere where they are also partying, for example in Budapest, where between the ruin bars and the nightly thermal parties you will grill unnoticed.
The scroll. The farewell promises if on the way out you have to take the keys from the driver because he's already drunk since morning. In the opposite direction, on the way back, if there is someone still able to take the car, that is not a farewell, it is an expedition of the young beavers. Either book a ride back or plan drinks somewhere that's within reasonable walking distance.
Swing. You have to eat the steak in the center of the table quickly because you are in a very competitive environment and if you are not careful they bite your arm. If you reach a rate of one drink every half hour, you might miss things and wake up with blackouts. That is not necessarily bad . You have to shoot the boyfriend at the last minute, don't be rude and don't start proposing him with coffee.
when to go The police will kindly point you out.
The very married friend. He hasn't separated from the churumbeles and the relative for years. His exit will remind you of something he saw on Estafeta street in Pamplona. He is knocked out in the second bar.
The one with the tests. Probably the future brother-in-law of the groom. He takes this as a gymkhana who thinks he will win. The progression of the tests becomes: drinking glasses in one gulp, saying funny phrases to girls, getting kisses, jumping from the top of a fountain, drawing obscenities on the plaster in the hospital.
The next morning. The survival instinct turns last night into pleasant memories. A camaraderie floats that has to do with what unites sharing misfortunes , in this case one of those hangovers where you would cry. Trust your friends, because they will know what to do to overcome it together, which is more wine and more steak.
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