The ABC's of English flirting
PLAN A
1. If you're looking for him, I'll catch you here, I'll kill you here, the downtown or the City of London they are your thing: from Monday to Friday the pubs are overflowing with bank and corporate blokes abandoning themselves to the sweet afterwork exercise. The image is not going to be pretty, I'm warning you now...
two. In these kind of pubs no music snobs . It doesn't matter if they put The Calling either The Goo Goo Dolls: you follow the roll, if necessary even sing... better if you splash beer on the one next to you (they put these things on these people).
3. British shyness is lost with the first pint of ale . It has its good things and its bad things. The rush hour is 9:00 p.m. If at 00.00 you haven't solved it, leave it for another day. British midnight is equivalent to 6 am in Spain. That is to say: when the lights come on and you realize that the person you have been talking to for the last two hours is a grotesque.
Love from the Golden Eye
PLAN B
Four. If you are a romantic and what you are looking for is a healthy, happy and lasting relationship... Put yourself down: there is nothing more attractive in this country than humiliating yourself... laugh at yourself, friend (if you want to be confident, go back to plan A) .
5. Make sure you make ridiculous jokes. The dumber the better. Believe me, the British humor of Oscar Wilde is dead: what is fashionable is LittleBritain.
Practical example: Why did Adele cross the road? (Why did Adele cross the road?) To say HELLO FROM THE OTHER SIDE (To say 'hello' from the other side).
6. If you're lucky enough not to look like an absolute idiot trying to do an imitation of Alan Partridge and you convince your victim to go to dinner, be very careful: don't be ridiculously patriotic and go for tapas.
6.**a) ** You may find yourself with the surprise of paying your salary for a reduction of potato omelette.
6.**b) ** Your partner, having taken you out of your routine of curry and battered sausages, orders a stew thinking that it is a delicatessen and the night does not end particularly well.
The power of love
PLAN C
If none of the above is your thing or doesn't work, download Tinder or similar. Whether it's for a quickie (love, don't be rude) or a proper relationship, it's your best option... Today, I know more couples from the social network than couples who have met in a bar... if not THEY LIE.
the triumph of love